Original post can be found here on the official Alpha Phi blog.

When I accepted my bid to Alpha Phi, an older member promised that I made one of the best decisions in my life. I never had a doubt about the decision, but it did take me seven years to realize the complexity of what Alpha Phi on a bid card would mean for me and I am willing to bet I have more aspiring moments to look forward to.

I have been working for the same company since my college graduation. When hired, my company’s policy was that new hires could not work where they were familiar (no hometown, no college town), and because the complexity of the business and rapid changes, it was common that a new manager would only know where they were headed to work a few weeks before their scheduled start date.
Sound scary? How did that work out for me? Well…

It was amazing!

Each time I relocated, I did not have a plan, I was in an unfamiliar city where I had never been before, and most importantly I did not have friends or family waiting to greet me and help me, but I did have Alpha Phi.

With each new city, it only took a few clicks online to find the closest alumnae chapter and just like that (click, click, click) I had a girls’ night out, I had a recommended hair stylist and honest real estate advice. Six years, three relocations, three different regions of the United States, two condos and many, many moving vans, packing crews and apartments later, I realize that home is wherever I am.

Over dinner with some colleagues, I discussed the journey we had been on since college, a whirlwind of a journey. When it was my turn to vent, I realized I had absolutely nothing to actually vent about. At that moment I realized that joining Alpha Phi truly was one of the best and significant decisions I have made. As important as my chapter sisters were to molding my collegiate experience, Alpha Phi on a grander scale is just as important to molding my entire life experience. Alpha Phi is the link to a new city being my home, friends right around the corner, and far less things to worry about in an unfamiliar city. Alpha Phi was yielding a completely different experience for me than my non-Greek peers.

In the end, no matter where I go, I am an Alpha Phi; no matter how much I give back, my sisters across the country will give me more than I could ever repay. Back then it was two words on a piece of stock card, and now a few clicks on the Alpha Phi website are the keys to my success in a new city, the next job or my next step in life.

So log onto to http://www.alphaphi.org to get reconnected, your sisters are waiting to hear from you.

Jennifer Hernandez (Iota Beta-St. Mary’s) currently resides in Bay Harbor Islands, FL.

Original post can be found here on the official Alpha Phi blog.

I love history and genealogy, so, family photos and collectibles have always meant a lot to me. This is both a blessing and a curse. It is a blessing that I actually enjoy looking at things hanging on my walls, in my bookcases, on top of my mantle. They define me, my interests and those of my husband and my son. The curse is that my house is getting full!

The secret for me has been to begin to identify what items might belong in another place where they can be treasured and appreciated and not end up at a garage sale. In the case of Alpha Phi items, I have tracked the sale of Alpha Phi badges and other items for initiated members only being sold on eBay for several years now. Luckily, the number of badges being sold online has decreased as more members learn and remember the proper way to handle badges. The Alpha Phi badge, upon the member’s death, should either be buried with the member, given to another Alpha Phi or sent back to the Executive Office. Nancy Theisen Bennett (Delta Tau–LSU) currently resides in Fresno, CA.

Personally, I have begun to give away to other Alpha Phi’s the items I no longer wear with much frequency. As friends’ daughters have joined Alpha Phi, I have given away some clothing and some jewelry. They love it as it truly is “retro” and certainly appreciate the thought. Several years ago, I was given a beautiful raised crest disc necklace by an older alum and neighbor who wanted me to have it to wear to Alpha Phi functions. I have worn it with great pride and always told the story when I wore it and gotten a lot of compliments. Should I stop wearing it, I will make sure to pass it along to a younger Alpha Phi that I know will treasure it as I have. It is important for Alpha Phi’s legacy to keep these badges and jewelry and even clothing in member’s hands. Anything less degrades the special nature of these items we all wear with pride.

In gifting of Alpha Phi items, also consider giving back to your collegiate chapter or a local chapter in your area. If your local collegiate chapter conducts silent auctions as fundraisers at events, some of these “vintage” items could be big sellers.

If you do see an Alpha Phi badge or even another sorority or fraternity badge at an estate sale and you cannot afford to purchase it, consider contacting a member who might be interested. I was at an antique sale several years ago and spotted a Phi Mu badge. I contacted one of my Phi Mu friends in Fresno Alumnae Panhellenic who knew the vendor and purchased it from her to give to another Phi Mu. And, as the family member who collects, I had been given my grandmother’s Alpha Delta Pi Initiation Certificate (1922, Kansas State) along with some other mementos from her college days. I contacted the Alpha Delta Pi Memorial Chair at their national headquarters. After describing the items in detail, she was thrilled to have them sent to her and I know my grandmother would be thrilled as well.

I encourage you to protect Alpha Phi’s legacy and feel good about passing along your legacy.

Nancy Bennett (Delta Tau-LSU) currently resides in Fresno, CA.

Original post can be found here on the official Alpha Phi blog.

You go to several weddings in your life. You meet your friends’ cousins, co-workers and childhood best friends. You shake hundreds of hands, and there’s small talk until you settle on something in common. “Oh, you work in health care? So does my mom!”

At one wedding just when I was growing tired of the idle chit-chat, I was introduced to the bride’s friend from college. We started talking about the good old days, and of course sororities came up. She is an Alpha Phi from the Beta Alpha chapter at Illinois – our common ground had been established. Our faces lit up, and we gave each other the hand shake with a knowing look. Instantly, she rose above all of the other new acquaintances and became a friend. We spent the rest of the night reminiscing about social events and comparing notes on our philanthropy fundraisers.

I have not moved far from my alma mater, the University of Maryland, but Washington, DC, attracts people from all over the country. At cocktail parties or even riding the Metro, I’ll meet an Alpha Phi or see a girl in an APhi t-shirt and feel an immediate kinship.

Major life changes like new jobs and moving can be intimidating; you’re meeting several new people and some of your best friends are no longer conveniently nearby. Every so often though, you come upon someone who has a shared outlook, who you already know cherishes the same values and who knows the true meaning of sisterhood. You meet an Alpha Phi, and the world gets a little smaller.

Maggie McGuire (Delta Zeta-Maryland) currently resides in Chevy Chase, MD.

Original post can be found here on the official Alpha Phi blog.

For me, promoting my Greek membership began in August 1972 when I stepped off the bus from picking up my bid card at the LSU student union and was welcomed at the Alpha Phi house with my new pledge sisters. That night is still a blur to me.

I quickly found out that a couple of girls in the dorm were also Alpha Phi new members. In short order, we made our way to the closest store to purchase our first Alpha Phi t-shirts – customized stitched on letters with our name on the back! With the purchase of this new t-shit, I was now promoting Alpha Phi all across campus. We were SO proud to be affiliated with Alpha Phi that we were promoting Alpha Phi without even thinking about it. We started learning all of the songs, the different chapters and the history of Alpha Phi. After initiation all members received a wonderful Centennial history of Alpha Phi that I still cherish today. It also became a lot easier to promote our membership when Alpha Phi adopted the Bear as a mascot when I was in college. That was a lot easier to cuddle with than an ivy plant!

After graduation, marketing my Greek membership became rather vague. I am an extroverted person and a joiner so when I interact socially or join organizations, Alpha Phi comes up naturally in conversation. It definitely helped in meeting other Alpha Phis when I mentioned my membership in social situations. It also helped me professionally, as I was told by friends that two women at the bank I worked at were also Alpha Phis. It even helped to seal the deal on selecting my son’s first daycare. The care provider showed me one of her daughter’s room that was set up with cribs and there on the wall was the girl’s Alpha Phi composite from USC. So, it definitely benefited me personally to mention my Alpha Phi membership.

The role of promoting Greek membership changed as I became a mother. My son saw my involvement first hand as a volunteer as well as my husband’s for his fraternity, Alpha Gamma Rho, where he was a treasurer of the local house corporation board. During my son’s senior year of high school, I actively asked his friends about their interest going a fraternity or sorority. I wrote recommendation letters for any of the young women who I knew well and considered to be good candidates for Alpha Phi. I also did my homework on the chapter at the school they were planning on attending. I took it upon myself to find out the other sororities at the school and helped connect the young women with women in the community who could write a recommendation for those sororities. This is a great way to promote the National Panhellenic groups as a whole. If the woman ended up joining Alpha Phi, I would call her mom to volunteer that if she, as a mom, had any questions that I would be happy to help.

Volunteering at recruitment for any local college is also a wonderful way to promote Greek membership as these young women see that you, as a Greek member, are still involved. Alpha Phi is a lifelong membership and alumnae should embrace any opportunity that allows them to demonstrate this to our younger members. Remember, you “ARE” an Alpha Phi not, I “WAS” an Alpha Phi!

Nancy Bennett (Delta Tau-LSU) currently resides in Fresno, CA.

Original blog post can be found here on the official Alpha Phi blog.

In 2003 I was a successful career woman with a great job, a great house, fun friends, and big plans for being a working mom. Then that week came when we were supposed to take our little one to day care. My husband and I simply couldn’t do it, and so began my journey to maintain a sense of myself.

What is self? I suppose it’s the place where you’re comfortable with what you know, how you apply it, and what is going on in your world. If what you know shifts, how do you remain grounded? That’s been a question I ask myself almost daily.

For me, that’s where Alpha Phi has become truly valuable. College was a tremendous experience for me, full of all the superlatives you can throw at a time in your life with relatively low responsibility and high ability to do as you please. I joined as a junior and did not choose a leadership path because I knew my tenure was short. In that that time, I learned many valuable lessons on relationships and meeting expectations.

So many women I know struggle with where they fit in the world. Whether they’re in the workforce or at home for their tasks, I find many of my friends are simply drained from all they do. Stress, boredom, repetition, and lack of recognition take their toll on everyone, but especially women who want to have it all.

I’m not immune to feeling drained. Over the past eight years of my sabbatical from “a real career,” I’ve worked to build some defenses over feeling downtrodden. One method is not foolproof, but it’s so effective that it makes me sad others don’t use it.

You guessed it—I stay in touch with Alpha Phi. I take it a step beyond just the “I sent in my lifetime dues” category, although that is important and might be just what other need. I have found that I need to maintain a relationship with my alumnae chapter.

I can hear the explanations now. I’m too busy. Work wears me out. The kids have baseball, ballet, basket weaving practice. We’re all on the life path, friends, with the same amount of time in our day. And here’s what I learned, not from my Alpha Phi life, but some other key friends: if you don’t take care of you, there’s nothing left to give those you love.

What do I get from my involvement? Much like exercise gurus will encourage you to put your workout on your calendar, when I book an Alpha Phi meeting, I create a mini-goal. Get to that meeting and you’ll feel better. It works. There’ve been times I thought I should skip, but I think of the encouragement I’ll receive and realize I’m trying to excuse myself from one of the key things in my life that enables me to simply be Melinda.

Okay, so I get a night out with friends. What else, you ask? In our alumnae chapter, I’ve met people at different stages of life. New grads. New moms. New retirees. Each woman is unique, coming from a very different place than me. Sharing their experiences helps me understand my own. Learning from them helps me go back to my corner of the world refreshed, renewed, and ready to be the best I can be.

I encourage you to make that appointment for yourself. I think you’ll be surprised at how Alpha Phi can help you right now.

Melinda Wedding (Gamma Iota-Texas Tech) currently resides in McKinney, TX.

Original post can be found here on the official Alpha Phi blog.

When I joined Alpha Phi six years ago, I don’t think I truly anticipated such lifelong support and friendship. I also didn’t expect my dream travel experience to include bats, tons of rain, or really hard, dirty, sweaty work—let alone all of those things. Last Friday, I returned from a two-week trip to Peru with one of my closest Alpha Phi sisters and had the time of my life. And all of the above? It rang true.

Bouncing from Lima to Cuzco to a lodge in the jungle, my grand-little Lindsey and I had a blast. But some of our stories stick out for their pure unluckiness. For our first three days in Peru’s very varying weather, we only had what we’d worn on the plane. Our luggage was lost, taking its sweet time coming to our little corner of Cuzco. When it finally arrived looking like it just got out of the ring witsome MMA fighter, we found most everything had been stolen from the outer pockets, though our locks had saved the rest. Thank goodness! A few days later we were in the Amazon rain forest  grabbing Lindsey’s iPod from our room at the lodge and—was it raining? No, bats were using us as targets for their excrement. And they were quite accurate. Later in the trip, we got stuck on a lake in the middle of the jungle in torrential rain (this time from the sky, not unwanted roommates) and had to hike through a newly machete-chopped path, and I could go on with the hilariously unfortunate events that added fun bumps to our path through Peru.

After our adventures in the city and rain forest  Lindsey and I had an incredibly humbling and exhilarating week in Piura, Peru, on a mission trip. In Piura, we built homes from the ground up. We brought food to families who needed it. And we took care of the homebound, among many other things. Through it all, we were greeted with endless love, grace and seemingly bottomless gratitude, truly opening our hearts and minds to what’s most important in life. We knew it before, but it wasn’t what was in our luggage. It was what—and who—we found when we landed.

The only other time I remember feeling such instant, incredible warmth and love was when I joined the sisterhood of Alpha Phi those six years ago. The feeling of knowing someone would be there for me even at my worst, make me smile when that’s the last thing on my mind, and send positive prayers, energy or whatever you’d prefer to call it in my direction at all times is a rare one, and as sisters we are blessed beyond measure. After all, having someone to help you clean up after a bat encounter is irreplaceable.

Alysse Gear is a 2011 alumna of the Gamma Omicron chapter at Drake University. She graduated with a degree in magazine journalism and another degree in English, and her most beloved college memories involve her sisters in Alpha Phi. As a collegian, Alysse was on several committees (New Member committee was her favorite!) and served as Spirit Chair, Community Standards Chair and Chaplain. She now works as a copy editor and the environmental committee leader at Reader’s Digest-Milwaukee and spends her free time pursuing environmental causes, working on her blog and traveling to visit her Alpha Phi sisters. Alysse can’t wait to make more memories as a new member of the alumnae world and help others stay involved along the way.

Original post can be found here on the official Alpha Phi blog.

Having a career in any office presents challenges – refrigerator food theft, heading to the break room about to pass out only to find an empty coffee pot because that new intern is not doing his job, waking up early, sitting next to a mouth breather, trying not to go insane within the confines of your gray, dreary cubicle, and all sorts of other fun stuff.

How about adding this to the mix? – you’re an electrical engineer and are part of an overwhelming minority of women in your office. On top of all the standard office challenges, you are provided with the experience of being treated differently from your peers. This is my life. I’ve noticed different sets of obstacles provided by older men and by younger men – but both are frustrating and it’s easy to have a hard time.

Granted, the times are changing for the better. Younger men who are not accustomed to old-fashioned culture are respecting women more as engineers. They expect the same level of expertise regardless of gender. They trust women with equal responsibility, which makes excelling in the career much easier. However, I’ve found that a new set of challenges (and some old ones) occur with younger men in the office.

If you have these issues, your main weapon against “woman treatment” is… You are an Alpha Phi! Alpha Phi’s are strong, and Alpha Phi’s know what they are doing. Alpha Phi’s also receive advice from other Alpha Phi’s. Here’s mine for any of you who are uncomfortable in a male-dominated office:

Ask questions if you don’t know how to do something. However, begin your question with a display of your knowledge.

I’ve noticed that whenever I just asked a question at work, an older gentleman would begin his answer with the most basic principles that any engineer should already know, which he wouldn’t do if a man had asked. For example, if I were to ask how to set up my voicemail, some older men I’ve worked with would probably say “So, a telephone is a device used to communicate with another individual remotely – which means from a distance. Some phones are equipped with ‘voicemail’ which is a system designed so that you can leave a message in a person’s phone if they are not near it at the time of your call.” This frustrated me to no end. However, I discovered that if you display your knowledge up front on a consistent basis, men will raise their expectations, your responsibility levels, and consequently their respect for you.

Ask for constructive criticism frequently.

At first, men may be hesitant to give you any. But after some period of consistent badgering, they will start to answer your questions about what you can improve upon. Eventually, they will start to offer unsolicited advice, and you will be able to really thrive in your career.

If someone pulls a prank on you, do not take it personally or complain to  management.

Most companies will advise you to report office mischief, but I disagree (unless the prank caused damage to yourself or your cubicle). On most occasions, pranks are sort of an initiation into a group, which is a good thing. I have noticed that women are usually prime targets for multiple “attacks,” though. My theory is that young men expect women react to pranks in ways that are incredibly humorous to them. So what should you do? Laugh about it, and take revenge on the perpetrator (in a safe, harmless way of course!). It will show that you’re easy-going and not high maintenance, which can make people more comfortable working with you. Having working relationships is extremely important.

Keep in touch with your sisters on breaks.

Many of your alumnae sisters may be in an office environment as well. It helps to air any grievances to each other, and you may be able to give and receive some good advice! My chapter has a message board set up so that the alumnae and collegiate members can communicate all the time. We usually have threads dedicated to work/office complaints, and it really does help us all out with uncomfortable situations. Some of the stories actually end up being pretty funny too, and a good laugh can help you get through a bad day no matter where you work.

Get used to/ignore being called “hun,” and other terms of endearment.

I haven’t been able to avoid this particular nuisance. On the bright side, at some point the younger men who are used to modern culture will be the only ones who haven’t retired. I think this is just something that will take a few more years to phase out, and if this is your only obstacle related to being female in a male dominated, you are doing really well for yourself.

Happy careering, ladies! I expect to see you as CEOs. 🙂

Yvette Babich was born and raised in the beautifully scenic land of Southeast Michigan, where she recently graduated from the Iota Epsilon chapter of Alpha Phi at Kettering University. As an undergrad, she took exciting opportunities to hold positions within her chapter, including Director of Publicity and Advertisement, Director of Music, Director of Member Development, Chaplain, and Vice President of Chapter Operations. The chapter truly shaped her into the confident person that she is today.

These days, she holds a bachelor’s degree in electrical engineering and is at the starting line of her career as a power systems engineer in downtown Detroit. She’s looking forward to what’s in store and the adventures she will continue to have with sisters/best friends, and is thankful for the opportunity to share her alumnae experience with the best and brightest women of the world!

Original post can be found here on the official Alpha Phi blog.

Volunteering your time is a win-win.  For the organization with which you volunteer, your efforts and time, no matter how small, add up to support their cause.  But for you, in every volunteer experience, there is something you can learn or take away from it.  And this helped me in ways I could never have imagined.

I started my first “real” job with a small software company in Atlanta.  Each day was filled with new challenges that stretched my brain, but more importantly tested my confidence as a leader. However, I found that I spent my day interacting with people exactly like me – and people even more analytical and less social than me. It seemed like advancing my career would require me to gain more confidence, project management, and team management skills and experience – but where would I get real-life opportunities?

At about the same time, I started volunteering for Alpha Phi.  A woman from my chapter asked me to help her test a software project for Alpha Phi, not unlike what I did at work each day.  Of course, I agreed.  Later that year, I was asked to serve on the Fraternity’s Technology committee, followed the next biennium on the Collegiate Recruitment Resources Committee.  I was learning all sorts of new “people” skills, while contributing to Alpha Phi the technology skills I already developed.

Later, I received a phone call from a past International President who wanted to talk about what types of things I aspired to accomplish in Alpha Phi.  Then it hit me, I have two separate career paths I need to manage.  That sounded like a lot of work, so I took the list of skills I’d need for both career paths, merged them into one, and determined which method – volunteer job or paid job – I could use to obtain them. I ended up deciding to continued to serve Alpha Phi on the CMSC, IRT, and SPC, as well as being a recruitment volunteer and finally Regional Manager.

And my approach paid off after 15 years.

Earlier this year, I was approached by another software company for a Senior Manager position. Professionally, I had never held a position this high, and for a moment was not sure I had the experience and confidence to take this on.  As I read the position description, and thought about the required skills and experience… But then I realized I had all of that – through being an Alpha Phi volunteer.  As Regional Manager, I was responsible for the performance of many chapters, most of which I did not have direct interaction with. I also needed to coach younger volunteers and collegiate officers as they worked with their chapters and found their own Alpha Phi career paths.  Finally, I had to ensure the success of projects and chapter oversight with a volunteer pool that was constantly changing and evolving.

And that is exactly what this company is asking me to do.  Having thought this through in advance of the interview, I was easily able to articulate that my middle management volunteer roles in a sizeable non-profit organization gives me the opportunity everyday to manage projects and people, to coach others of various levels of skills and experience in a fast-paced, medium-turnover environment, and to advance the overall organization through my contributions. I never would have thought that the main skill sets that qualified me for this job would have been taught to me and mastered through volunteering. Alpha Phi helped shape and elevate my career.  My time invested was well spent and not only rewarding from a volunteer standpoint, but also that of career advancement.  Leveraging my volunteer skills allowed me to obtain the job I wanted and will enrich my experience in a new professional role.

Andi Etwaroo (Zeta Omicron-Johns Hopkins) is the extension team lead for our Iota Sigma chapter at Carnegie Mellon, and she also serves as the co-chair for the Alpha Phi Strategic Planning Committee